All I Have To Give

Nothing resonates with a neglected woman like, "I don't want you to cry no more inside." Whoever wrote this for them was pretty good but didn't hit their stride until they penned Rebecca Black's "Friday."

If I Said...

Their follow up, "Is Your Dad A Lumberjack Because I've Got Wood In My Pants" wasn't as big a hit.

Hocus Pocus

I know what you're going to say. You're going to say, "What's wrong with you. This rocks." If you say that I know you didn't listen to the whole thing. It's an awesome song... until the yodeling. Then it gets cool again. Then the yodeling. Then it's awesome. Then Popeye shows up followed by Ron Burgundy and his jazz flute. You'd think after that we're good to go but then the accordion comes in...

Just Got Paid

The crap begins in less than 8 seconds. He manages to screw up each and every "YEAH" and "OW!" If Michael Jackson couldn't sing or dance he'd be Johnny Kemp.

Born This Way

Yeah, she's a great performer. Siegfried and Roy are also great performers but I'm not going to buy their album either. Lady Gaga = music for deaf people.

You Get What You Give

I'd feel bad for the members of the Radicals that didn't make it to this new iteration if this song didn't suck so much. Nothing ensures longevity like a list of pop culture references.

No Scrubs

They say they "don't want no scrubs" but if Salt 'n' Peppa taught me anything it's that the ladies don't care as long as the man looks good.

You Gotta Be

You'd think the four of them could come up with verses a little more diverse. There is nothing empowering about this song. The bridge sucks too.

I Can't Drive 55

I can forgive what he did to Van Halen but I can't forgive this. I wonder if his inability to drive 55 still causes him grief.

How Can We Be Lovers

Apparently Michael Bolton has never heard of $!#@ buddies.